Do All Salesmen Lie?

Well, right around the Durga Puja's DH told me that he wanted to go see Peepli Live! so I looked and found that one was playing that afternoon. So off we went. I had also been telling me (for a very long time!!) that he needed to buy new jeans. So we went and watched the movie, which was in Hindi, so it needed to be translated for me! We were wandering around the mall when we spotted a Levi's store, and so we went in. DH starts looking around and then said, "lets go" so we left. I asked him what was up, and he told me that he didn't like the store because it was trying to be something it wasn't. We proceeded on our expedition for jeans, and ended up at the Lee store. They were very helpful and we managed to find 2 pairs of jeans that DH purchased. Well, here, if the pants are too long they will alter them for you (no additional charge) within a day or 2 (or if in cases of emergencies or flights same-day is possible). So we left the jeans with the store and were told to come back 2 days later to retrieve the jeans.

FAST FORWARD TO 2 DAYS LATER :

I arrive at the mall about 30 minutes or so before the scheduled time to pick up the jeans, so I wandered around. Just at 5pm I went to the store and was told that the jeans had not been completed that day and that they had spoken to DH and told him they would be ready tomorrow. Fine, no big deal! So out I went and then I called DH and asked him why if they had told him that they weren't ready he hadn't relayed the message to me? He proceeded to say he received no such call (missed calls yes, but he was in meetings and unable to take them!). So, then I was angry! I went back to the store and started going off. With my New York attitude, not so hard! I was furious because they had point-blank lied to me!

I went in and started let them have it, I attempted to scold them in bangla, but my bangla was not holding up well, and I was seriously screwing it up! So then I proceeded to english. I asked them WHY they had told me that they had told DH they would be ready tomorrow, when in fact they had not spoken to DH at all? Merely had called him! Why not just tell me the truth! Then the store manager said to me, "Madam, come back in 1 hour, they will be ready." I said ok, and wandered around the mall some more.

Meanwhile, they had again called DH and apologized and he explained to them why I was so angry. After an hour I went back and picked up the jeans.

The it is decided I need to buy some new jeans as the ones I currently own are getting worn-out. I decide to head to the same Lee store, knowing I will get the best service. I walk in and they are all like, "Madam, yes, how can we help you?" and proceeded to help me pick out a pair of jeans, after discarding most of the options (cause I ain't gonna wear no skinny leg jeans!!). Thank goodness those jeans were already the correct length, so there was no need to alter them.

Well, yesterday I went back to this same store to purchase another pair of jeans. I told them I don't want skinny leg pants at all!! So they look over the whole store looking for my correct size and desire. I found a pair I liked, and since they were long on me, they would have to be altered. They said they would come back tomorrow, and I said, "pucca?" (you sure?), yes they responded.

Well...as I'm ringing up the purchase, the poor guy who got the brunt of my rage last time walks in, and tells me, "yes, madam, they will be ready tomorrow" and proceeds to tell the other salesmen that I had already had a problem. He was claiming that the problem was because of the puja's and that the alterations were not ready, and I told him that was incorrect, it was because they had lied.

So I went back today to pick up my jeans, almost hoping that they weren't done, so I could be a total raving lunatic again for a good reason...ok, not really, but you know, it woulda been fun!! And they were ready :-)

Learning Bangla

FYI : bangla = bengali language, bengali = person of Bengal descent

This is probably one of the hardest blog posts to write, as I'm not entirely sure what angle to write from!!! Learning a new language above the age of 25 (which I am!!) is quite difficult, and that too a Indic language.

I took a 1 year course, 6 months of Junior level, and 6 months of Senior level, at Ramakrishna Mission Institute of Culture, Golpark. The classes were held 2 days a week for 1 1/2 hours each. There were about 10-12 people in my Junior class, which consisted of about 5-6 bideshi (meaning foreigner in bangla), from Germany, US, and Canada, and 4 Indians from all over India. Whereas in the Senior class there was only 3 of us, and we were all American (and we knew each other from the previous year).

In the beginning we started by learning to write and read the bangla script. That was an adventure!! DH made me practice over and over while he patiently corrected my mistakes until my script was legible and looked somewhat like...bangla. Also, we learned about conjugating verbs, and the normal grammar. For example, we have a friend who is a probashi bengali (meaning non-resident / migrant bengali) who can speak bangla but he can't read it. We had been waiting for a bus to take us near the airport and some of the buses have the destinations written only in bangla. We were waiting, and he was like come on! The bus is coming. I looked at him and said, "What are you smoking? That bus goes from Tollygunge Metro to Ultadanga. Not to the airport." DH looked at me and started busted up laughing, and then every time a bus comes that is only written in bangla, I will tell him where it goes. =] Because I'm a mean bou-di!

Now, I am always anxious to show off my awesome bangla reading scripts, well...except the conjoining of some letters leaves me confused!! I must admit, I still have problems with the conjugations, but like I keep telling DH and myself that I've only been learning bangla for a year, and I wasn't even fluent in English at age 1!!!

I'm still learning slowly, but I'm to the point where I can understand more than I can speak. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or not, but I can get my point across.

I've had many experiences of shocking and surprising many people with my bangla skills. Once when I was taking a bus home, I was waiting to get down, and the bus driver asked me, "ekhane namben?" (will you get down here?) and to which I replied, "Na, aami opere nambo" (I will get down above, meaning above the circle.) Then the usual went on to be asked, that I knew bangla, and how I learned it, and why I'm here, and how long I've been here. I usually give my standard answers. I usually just say that I learned bangla at Ramakrishna Mission at Golpark, and I'm here because my husband is bengali, and I've been here for about a year and half. It's always a conversation starter when I speak to them in bangla.

Also, one day we had a friend from out of town come to Kolkata and DH and I had decided to pick him up from the airport and then go out for dinner. Usually we are able to get a taxi from the stand in front of our house. Well, this time there wasn't any to be had, so I took a bicycle rickshaw to the crossing. I asked the taxi, "airport jabe?" (will you go to the airport?) naturally he said yes. I got in the backseat and said, "dada, aamar saami pick-up korte hobe. O aamar jonno Silver Spring Club-e dariye achhe, tarpor airport jabo" (meaning Dada, we have to pick up my husband. He is waiting for me at the Silver Springs Club, then I will go to the airport). He said, ok, and off we went. We went off to the area, and DH told us to go through the bus lane, and so we started that way, and the cop told the driver, "jete parben na" (you can't go) and the driver told him that a person was waiting for us. The cop asked, "ke?" (who?) and from the back seat I said, "aamar saami" (my husband) and after seeing me speak bangla the cop, said "jan jan" (go, go). So after successfully picking up DH off we went to the airport!

We also learned how to say certain phrases and some idioms. My favorite being "bhul bhal bhaje kotha bolo na" which roughly translates to "stop talking utter crap!!" 

This school was good for the amount of money we paid, I think we paid less than Rs 150 (less than $5) a month. I will be attending it again to learn hindi.

Diwali in Kolkata

Well, as you all probably know tomorrow is Diwali. Diwali is (in simple terms, as there is really no way to summarize it easily) the festival of lights. This holiday is accompanied by lots of small lamps and lights (imagine Christmas lights, and chinese lantern lights!) all over the city.

Along with this there are fireworks going off all over the city!!

This is a small firework shop near my home. This is insane! In the US one usually buys fireworks from Wal-Mart or Target, or any other department store (unless you live by a place where you can get the illegal ones! ;-)....)

Imagine rows upon rows, stalls upon stalls, selling small little lamps filled with wax up and down each street!! There are some that are plain red clay and others more ornate!!

And this my dear readers, is the thing I hate the **MOST** the crowds!!! DH sent me this photo because he knew I was planning to post about this. The reason why there are so many people out, is because it is considered auspicious to purchase new items, so that is why many people, like Sharell at Diary of a White Indian Housewife, paint their houses and buy new appliances.

DH told me the guy in the yellow plaid shirt, was going around the store shouting, "Oven, toaster, griller going for 3,900 rupees. Get it now or it will all be gone in the next 15 minutes. Only a few left!" *sigh* So glad I don't get into this shopping frenzy!!

So, tomorrow, you will find me sitting in my house, watching Dancing with the Stars on youtube, or something, because I ain't going out with the crowds!!!

Happy Diwali! :-)

Blog name

I'm betting a lot of people are probably wondering about the name of this blog and how it came to be.

So I'll explain how it came to be. I had told DH that I wanted to write an anonymous blog (I love the freedom it gives me to express what I want to say without worrying about anybody knowing who I am...) but I couldn't figure out a good name for it. He suggested chanacoffee, and at first I decided I didn't like that name as it sounded like a website for hot drinks.

After talking with The Bad Bhabi and going over numerous name ideas, some of which I liked, but the DH didn't and so on. I decided to just stick to chanacoffee.

The explanation DH gave me about the name was because Indians are equated with cha (tea)...or at least my husband is...and Americans coffee (strangely enough, I can only stand the cold coffee...)!!

So then chanacoffee was born!! :)

The "Puja" Police

Last night, DH, a friend and I went out for dinner at one of our favorite local joints. We had taken a taxi and were driving in, just talking. All of a sudden we noticed that the car in front of us was stopped, and was surrounded by a group of local boys, probably homeless children, or something...just being bullies. Mind you these kids weren't police, not trainees even. They were wearing dirty ragged clothes, and looked like they hadn't bathed in a day or two, and were just looking to get some easy money in the name of religion...

Well, it was our turn next. One kid stood in front of the taxi, therefore we couldn't just leave. I didn't understand the conversation as it was in hindi, but basically the gist was the kids wanted money for the "gods" (which they would then promptly pocket, I'm sure...) and the taxi driver was arguing that he was a taxi driver and he wouldn't give anything. So then the taxi driver started to drive away, and the kid fortunately moved, cuz you know, who would want to be run over? :-)

Then we get down, and my friend went to pay the meter and got in an argument with the driver. The driver was asking for 10 rupees extra to give them so they wouldn't hassle him. My friend promptly told the taxi driver, "You should have let him deal with us. They wouldn't have said anything to us, they couldn't have." (in hindi of course, you know, but was translated for me.) The driver wasn't given the 10 rupees, only the fare, and then we went for dinner and drinks.

Oh, yeah, and DH said to me, here, now you can blog about this. LOL!!

How to register at the FRRO

I had to go register at the FRRO, even though I am on a 10 year tourist visa, because you need a residence permit in order to apply for the Entry (X) visa conversion. This is what I had to do:

• Bring 4 Indian size passport photos
• 2-3 copies of your passport (first page, address page, visa page, and stamp page)
• address proof

Here they will give you 1 or 2 pages, that you have fill out again the customary 2-3 times.

The information you will need to fill out is (and this is directly from my copy of my residence permit, so it may vary from place to place):

1. Name
2. Father's / Husband's name (in this case I gave my husband's name)
3. Sex, height, and hair color
4. Date and place of birth
5. Present nationality and previous nationality (if any)
6. Manner and date of acquiring present nationality
7. Address of last residence outside of India
8. Address in India (with telephone number, if any. There are also options for a temporary address, such as hotel, and permanent address)
9. Profession and Occupation
10. Have you served in Military, Navy, or Airforces or its reserves in any country? If the answer is yes, give the details
11. Number, date & place of issue of Visa, Date up to which visa is valid
12. Number, date & place of issue of passport, date up to which passport is valid, particulars of other proof of identity
13. Port of place of embarkation or departure for India
14. Date and place of arrival in India. Flight No.         
15. Purpose of visit in India (tourist/business/employment/study/others/specify)
16. Places previous registration in India, if any
17. Name of husband/wife/children and their nationality (if accompanying the visitor)
18. Signature of the foreigners

Here we gave them :

• passport photos of me
• copy of my Indian bank account passbook
• and many other address proofs
• copy of marriage certificate
• copies of husbands voter ID card

We gave all our papers and they told us to come back in 2 weeks. There may be a police check required, but it never happened for us. 

Ideas?

Anyone have anything specific they would like me to write about, please comment and let me know! :)