Did you say you were a Nokia Priority Store? Seriously!?

DH managed to break his clip that holds the holster on his belt for his Nokia N900 (for those of you who have no idea about phones, this is more of a computer than a phone...) and thus is carrying the phone in just the holster. Now people, let me tell you why this worries me. I've heard stories about DH leaving things and losing them. Umbrellas, expensive cameras left in the front seat of a cab...this phone is not something I want him to lose. So...I ventured out Wednesday to see if I could find him something. I went to the road side store I usually buy the screen covers at, and they had a flip cover, but not what I wanted. So I proceeded to all the other stores around, and still nothing.

Then today since I had to go to the mall anyways, I went to the Nokia Priority store. Well...I went in and asked if they had a carrying case for the N900 to which I was asked if I had the phone, which I did not. The sales representative said to me, quite rudely, that I *HAD* to have the phone with me. To which I said, "ki dorkar achhe? aapnar product janen na?" (what need is there? do you not know you product?) At this point he pointed me to the sales counter. There I went, and as there was another customer, I waited patiently for my turn. The man at the counter then proceeded to ask me if the phone was like the guy had. I don't know what phone he had, but I proceeded to tell them that No, it was nothing like this phone. It was shorter, and fatter.

Seriously, Nokia India...shouldn't your sales people know about your products? The people at the road side store and at the other stores at least knew the phone I was talking about. Ridiculous!!

Trinca's, Toilets, and Tube Tops

Today the husband and I went out for dinner, well let me tell you...there are ladies who change their kids diapers in the bathroom using a shit load of toilet paper and just dump it all in the toilet and don't flush it...DISGUSTING!!!

We had gone out for dinner and I had to use the bathroom, and so I went and I go in and see the toilet stuffed full!!! I left disgusted...seriously?! If you don't know how to use the damn western toilet, THEN DON'T USE IT! Because leaving behind your kids shit for the world to see is disgusting.

Then I went to the Park Hotel to use their bathroom and OMG!!! Talk about slutty!! I was the only white person in the bathroom full of Indians, and all the others were wearing tube tops and short skirts that barely covered their ass...wtf?!

Horrified! The night was going so great until this!

2 years and some change

Well, today is the 2 year mark of me being in India.

Looking back, it's been an adventure, a roller coaster, anything but what I expected.

I've started (and continue to) learn Bengali. I can read, write, speak (to a certain extent) and understand quite a bit. I never imagined I would be learning a new language so late in my life that would be essential for every day, well, maybe Spanish (or brushed up I would say...) if I had stayed in the US. It was hard, and still is...I still have problems trying to say exactly what I want to say in bangla. I either say things in direct translation from english to bangla, which doesn't work, or I say them wrong! It's a work in progress.

Plus...I've had lots of things to learn to deal with, such as the traffic, the stares, and the hardest, being dependent on someone, and living with the in-laws.

The traffic isn't so scary now, I can still remember the first day I arrived in Kolkata. We had taken the Rajdhani Express from Delhi to Howrah. It was an adventure. At Delhi, we had gotten a porter, which I had no experience with, and while we were waiting to board the train, some guy had come up to DH and asked if he wanted his ears cleaned. W-O-W!!! Talk about shocking! I had never taken a train ride before, we had taken over the right side of the train (the bigger part of the compartment) and we spent the night watching movies and just talking and watching the scenery. We had gotten off the train and went to wait in the pre-paid taxi stand to go home, we had numerous taxi drivers try to rip us off, and DH asked me if I wanted him to pay the extra or if we should wait. I said wait...I can still remember the feel of the sweat dripping down my back and face, bap re bap! It was so hot and humid.

The ride home...well, I was seeing things for the first time, and I was scared! The traffic was horrible, and scared the living daylights out of me!! But now I'm cool with it, and I joke with DH about waiting to see how my family deals with the traffic. hehe!

I've always been independent, I hate being dependent on others, and I **HATE** being treated like a child, and always having to tell someone where I am going and what I am going to be doing. I guess, that is just the Indian culture, and I have to deal with it, but having to tell my MIL where I am going and why I am going is getting old. I'm 27 years old, I need my independence, so I'm waiting with bated breath for the day we move out.

Also...the food, the adapting was not so bad...but there are some foods that I can't stand, but I still have to eat...like today...we're having gugni (chick peas)...which I can't stand...but I'll eat it for lunch, and maybe try to convince DH to take me out for a celebration dinner!

Yeah! 2 years!

trains, sardines, fish

 Well...it's that time of the year again. WEDDING SEASON!!!!


We have been invited to...about 4 since February. We don't go to many weddings, DH is very uncomfortable at weddings for some reason. Well, we went to one Thursday, because the young man who was a good friend and ex-work colleague of DH's. We had been going back and forth about going because it was quite some distance from our house. Then DH was swamped with work, and all that.

Well, I had promised the young man that we would come, and I don't take lightly to breaking promises. So we ended up going.

I had previously told the boy that I would wear a sari. Well, stupid me, I didn't practice before, I thought, oh! how hard could it be. Well, even with this Youtube video showing how to wrap it, it didn't happen. I tried really hard to get it right, but the fabric was just fighting against me. *sigh* Instead I wore my salwar suit that I wore for our wedding.

So...we get ready to go and we catch a bus to Ultadanga, where DH tells me we are going to take a local train. No big deal, right?

Well...I was *WRONG*!!! It was insane! One train came, that wasn't ours, and people just pushed on, and packed that train so full, that people were freaking hanging out the doors. Oh, and someone freaking jumped off the train onto the platform and ran straight into me! So...I put my purse over my shoulders, and prepared to get on a train like that. Hmm! Then the next train comes, and we are trying to get on it, and people are pushing! We didn't manage to get on that one. We took the next one though, with DH pushing me so I would get on. Right before the train was about to leave DH was still outside, so I see him pushing himself onto the train. We push in and in. This train is packed to the brim like sardines.

A man sees me, and tells me to come inside. So I push myself past all the people and go into one of the aisles between 2 benches. The guy then told a younger man who was sitting down to "give their guest a seat" and then tells me to sit down. He asked me where I wanted to get off, I didn't know the station name, so I asked Indra. The guy seemed pleased to see that I wasn't alone, and then proceeded to fall asleep while standing up. LOL

Then, about 1 stop before we needed to get off, we got up. It was an adventure, now I'm kinda not wanting to visit Mumbai, as DH says I will face this all day, every day. Yeah!

So, really, we didn't go to the wedding, we went to the bou-bhaat, which is the reception for the groom's side of the family. We went, met the bride, who was gorgeous (although a bit too decked up for me...but traditional Bengali style)! Then...it was time to eat...well, it was a traditional Bengali meal, which meant fish! Fish fry, fish curry...lots of fish. Needless to say, I only ate a bit of rice, and some gravy. :-)

We had fun! :-) And the train on the way home was MUCH emptier, thank goodness!

Out of the loop here

Sorry I've been out of the loop a bit with posting. DH and I went to Bangalore for 6 days and had fun with lots of our friends. Anyways, that's not what I planned to blog about.

A friend of ours had her baby a few days ago. Twins, a boy and a girl. Well, they are home...just came home today, and I want to buy them a gift. Well, seeing as how I've never bought a gift for a newborn baby in India I am sort of out of my element. I don't know what things are needed here, what sort of clothes I should purchase for the baby. I asked the mother, and she said, "Their aunty is buying them something, there is no need to ask. Whatever you want to buy." Well, as nice as that question is...it didn't answer my question. I don't know if they need anything, although I doubt it. So...what will I buy? It remains to be determined by what I find at the stores. I will post about that later.

This also brings me to think about the differences between India and in the US in regards to visiting after a new baby comes home. I remember when my friends and family had babies they wanted only immediate family to come the first few days to give the parents and the baby time to settle in to their new surroundings, and their new life. That's fine...that's what I'm used to. So, when I called today and asked and the father said, "chole esho" (come over) I was a bit shocked. I don't know why, I mean, here family is a big thing. So everything and anything is shared by family, and friends. So...this is just a culture thing.

But still...it remains to be determined is it a good thing?

I think, personally, that it might be a bad thing. The mother is probably worn out and wants some peace and quiet after being in the hospital, but this is their culture. :-) Lets see how it goes...hopefully DH and I will be going to visit the babies tonight!!

It seems a bit strange to me...

Today I was eating lunch by myself outside. Which gave me plenty of time to people-watch because I didn't have to keep up my side of the conversation.

This is what I saw.

There was 3 people sitting at the table next to me, 2 older ladies and a boy. Well, the boy was addicted to his game boy, and his mother was feeding him. The boy wasn't even looking up from the game, and just opened his mouth while his mother shovelled the food into his mouth.

I was aghast! I mean, this may be a cultural thing...but seriously, it if was my kid, he would have turned off that game and ate himself. geez!

Multi-race children, confusion or clarity?

Today, DH was reading this link, he had gotten from a friend's facebook page. I saw the title and was instantly interested and made him pass me the link. The article talks about people who are multi-race.

I've been thinking about this for a while. Will my children be completely confused? Will they be dominated by their dad's Bengali culture? How will their Bengali culture affect their actions? How will their upbringing be? Will they be confused?

Well, in this article the subjects go on to say that they know they are Asian and proud of it.

I'm more afraid because here in India, the aunts and uncles are more specifically labelled, as per their age / line on the totem pole. Like, the oldest aunt (or uncle's wife too) is called boro maima or boro mamima. And on (I am not entirely sure of all the names, so I am not giving them all...) and in the US we call our aunts and uncles, as Aunt GivenName and Uncle GivenName...so you can see how it would be a bit confusing for the children. But, then again, given that they will be brought up with both cultures, maybe it won't be so confusing?

While DH and I were discussing this topic just earlier, we had compared our friends situation to ours. Our 2 friends live in the US, and have 3 year old twin boys. While both of them can speak and understand English perfectly, one of them can speak and understand Bengali quite well, while the other one can understand it but not speak it. I believe this is because of how they are brought up, (our children will be brought up to speak both Bengali and English from the time they are born). These kids are essentially US citizens with Indian heritage, but their exposure to English and American culture is much more than the 1 month they spend in India every year or so.

Any thoughts? I will write more about this later, its just 1am, and I'm tired :-)

My meet-up with an Australian bengali wife :-)

Today I met up with a friend of mine (who I've only ever spoken to on Facebook before) who is Australian and is also married to a Bengali man!

We were talking about how long we had been married and what visa we were on, she happens to be on a Entry (X) visa while I'm on a tourist visa! She has been married for 4 years and for the first few years the husband's parents didn't even know they were married! Actually, the parents had sent the husband to India to interview prospective brides, when in actuality he went to marry her without anyone knowing!

Also, we talked about our in-laws reactions to us, her's were a bit upset and mine were completely fine with it (they had given up all hope that DH was going to marry...ever!) And we discussed how there are many cultural differences that cause problems, like staying in our rooms with our doors shut, she while studying, and me because I like to be alone, and how that causes the family to feel insulted. However, in American and Australian culture, that is perfectly normal and acceptable.

We also spoke about her first experiences living and visiting with her husbands family in the US! I feel for her because she lives in Australia and her husband in the US and they can only see each other for 3 months at a time (because Australians get 90 days on arrival!) but they are planning for the husband to move to Australia next year.

It was just fun to be with someone who know how it felt, and to just compare how it had been. All in all it was a fun trip! :-) Her husband comes into town on Sunday, so maybe DH and I will get together with the 2 of them sometime while they are here.